I apologize profusely for not posting in quite some time, especially when I promised you all photos and stories from my Sunshine Coast vacation. Unfortunately, both my Internet connection and the Blogger photo uploader hate me, thus banding together to unleash much technological frustration. I’m sorry to say I’ll have to put yet another massive delay on that. Please accept the following word-heavy but hopefully humorous post as an apology.
One of the many ridiculous facts I’ve learned in my disgusting yet delightful Human Biology class is that every cell (with the exception of parts of the brain) in your body is replaced over the course of seven years. You’re literally a new person every seven years! Today I turned 21, meaning I’m in my ‘third body.’ So I figured I’d tap into that section of gray matter that’s been with me all along and have a little conversation with my ‘past selves.’
Note: For those of you unfamiliar with what I looked like, simply picture a girl version of Little Pete from ‘The Adventures of Pete & Pete’ for Seven. Fourteen was a bit like this picture of Caleb Followill (but with a way bigger nose) and Eighteen makes a cameo, she’s a less ginger female ‘Goblet of Fire’ era Ron Weasley. You all know should what I look like now, although my hair has gone a bit Nigel Tufnel the past few months.
21- "Wow, at least I've had consistently strange men’s haircuts!"
7- "Quiet, fart face!"
21- “Crap, I forgot. You’re at the stage where I was a little brat for no apparent reason.”
14- “Ooooh, what phase am I then?”
21- “If I’m not mistaken, you just started the hanging out in Target and obsessively listening to bands like Sum 41 era. I can’t believe we used to think we that was fun.”
14- “RAWK!”
21- “Your Sum 41 finger puppets are going to be stolen soon. Along with the whole backpack.”
14- *gasp* “Do I ever get my bloody little black backpack back?”
21- “No. And Deryck Whibley marries Avril Lavigne.”
14- “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
7- “Haha!”
14- “Shut up, 7! George Harrison and Jack Lemon die.”
7- *breaks down crying*
21- “Hey now, stop it! Some good things happen in the future! I’m a writer and I get to go to concerts for free! Plus, I’m living in Australia! Pretty cool, huh?”
14- “Do you have a boyfriend?”
21- “Um, no.”
7- “Are you a famous writer?”
21- “Not at all.”
14- “Have you at least met Heath Ledger in Australia or something?”
21- “He’s dead too.”
14- “Why must you tell me all this?! WHY?”
21- “Because you can be a tad annoying, 14. Not as annoying as 7, but yeah. It’s nothing personal, I mean, as 14-year-olds go you aren’t bad at all. You’re just in that starting puberty thing that makes everyone a bit naturally caffeinated and spazzy at times.”
7- “I made up a story about a ghost that was so scary, nobody wanted to use the second floor bathroom. Jean peed her pants. Then I jumped over the playground fence and ran home at recess. Escaping school is fun.”
21- “You creepy little evil genius. Why couldn’t it be anyone between 3 and 6 instead of you here? They were adorable.”
14- “Well surely you aren’t the oldest one, why are you here? Shouldn’t there be at least a 28 here too?”
21- “I’m probably busy by then! Perhaps touring the country with my rocker husband, taking pictures of his band along the way and writing our adventures.”
7- “Yeah, dream on. Or you're dead before 28.”
21- “God, you are so morbid! And mean! The ghost fascination stays 8 through 12, but we went back to being nice again. Why are you so bitter for just that one year?”
7- “Because I really hate school, duh. They wouldn’t let me in the special smart class. They get to play 'Zoombinis' and 'Where in Time is Carmen Sandiego?' all day!”
21- “That's why? Really? Hmmm, yeah, I was never cool, was I? Damn.”
18- “Psh, what are you talking about? I’m cool! And I’m not just saying it because I falsely think I am, like 14 does. Now if you excuse me, I’m going to go babysit 3 and 4, the only other ages we were totally awesome.”
14- “Ooh, I forgot to ask, does ‘Return of the King’ turn out well? I bet it’s amazing! OMG, so excited for that!”
21- “18! I’m cool! Take me with you!”
18- “You spent the first few hours of being 21 watching Wolverine and obsessing over the inaccuracies. I like X-Men too, but man, that is pretty lame. You’re like, 21 going on 50 now.”
21- “Dammit. She’s right.”
7- "Haha, you're stuck with us!"
14- “WHEE! Look at me! I’m a pirate sailing around the living room in my purple sparkly inflatable chair! YARRR! WHEE!”
Showing posts with label sleeplessness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sleeplessness. Show all posts
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
lהngre borta הn hem
Unable to sleep and wanting to stop myself from further watching the strange Canadian cartoon about a bunch of teens taking orders from a fish with flattop hair to fight an old lady and her evil Chihuahua with a British accent, this morning I reread my last entry and I realized it was a tad snarky. They don’t even know about, yet alone read my blog, (psh, does anyone?) but I publicly apologize to my flatmates (not the one who leaves angry notes though, but he’s another matter) for being e-bitchy towards them. I just dislike how they have their own little ‘She-Ra Boy Haters Club’ and when I walk in the room they get all middle school, pretending to talk about something else like I don’t notice.
Then again, I can understand why they might not always want to spend time with me. See, they watch movies like ‘Sex and the City’ together, a film which I have suffered through seeing once already and considered breaking my own pinky finger as an excuse out of it. It’s the same reason they decline my offer to watch ‘Master and Commander,’ a Napoleonic war naval epic I have probably seen at least a dozen times. I get that I’m not exactly girly, but darn it, just because I prefer Henry Rollins to Hannah Montana doesn’t mean I’m against a good ol’ gossip fest about boys and whatnot. They should know that, considering my one wall: Kings of Leon :: the wall of an ‘80s fangirl: Tiger Beat pictures of Duran Duran. Please note however, Duran Duran < Kings of Leon, though I do enjoy the occasional boogie to “Hungry Like the Wolf.”
Getting back on point, I promised myself I would suck it up and rent a few movies all of us would like. I carefully chose three period piece costume drama type films that tend to have the right levels of romance (enough for them to keep interest but not so much that I want to gag) to battle scene (cool action, but not overly gory or annoyingly inaccurate to history) ratios. I was so proud for finally compromising like a big kid that I didn’t take much notice of the women in the city walking by with huge stupid looking hats perched on their heads. Which means I forgot today was the Melbourne Cup Horse Race, a joyous holiday which includes fighting back crowds of said hats, old men frantically placing bets, and people trying not to drop huge orders of food & booze they thought would be okay to transport back to their party on foot. It also means the TV was on the horses all day and there was to be no movie viewing tolerated. After all that, I grumpily gave up and took my bowl of store-brand Cocoa Pebbles back to my room where I spent the rest of my day reading to a soundtrack of music that's almost entirely in another language (for some reason, it’s been my favourite thing to listen to lately, especially if it’s in French or Swedish). I think this means I’m destined to end up living in a cave outside some strange modern Gaul or Viking community. Eh, it could be worse, at least I’m not one of the six people crushed to death by a vending machine every year (that was my Snapple cap fact the other day).
Then again, I can understand why they might not always want to spend time with me. See, they watch movies like ‘Sex and the City’ together, a film which I have suffered through seeing once already and considered breaking my own pinky finger as an excuse out of it. It’s the same reason they decline my offer to watch ‘Master and Commander,’ a Napoleonic war naval epic I have probably seen at least a dozen times. I get that I’m not exactly girly, but darn it, just because I prefer Henry Rollins to Hannah Montana doesn’t mean I’m against a good ol’ gossip fest about boys and whatnot. They should know that, considering my one wall: Kings of Leon :: the wall of an ‘80s fangirl: Tiger Beat pictures of Duran Duran. Please note however, Duran Duran < Kings of Leon, though I do enjoy the occasional boogie to “Hungry Like the Wolf.”
Getting back on point, I promised myself I would suck it up and rent a few movies all of us would like. I carefully chose three period piece costume drama type films that tend to have the right levels of romance (enough for them to keep interest but not so much that I want to gag) to battle scene (cool action, but not overly gory or annoyingly inaccurate to history) ratios. I was so proud for finally compromising like a big kid that I didn’t take much notice of the women in the city walking by with huge stupid looking hats perched on their heads. Which means I forgot today was the Melbourne Cup Horse Race, a joyous holiday which includes fighting back crowds of said hats, old men frantically placing bets, and people trying not to drop huge orders of food & booze they thought would be okay to transport back to their party on foot. It also means the TV was on the horses all day and there was to be no movie viewing tolerated. After all that, I grumpily gave up and took my bowl of store-brand Cocoa Pebbles back to my room where I spent the rest of my day reading to a soundtrack of music that's almost entirely in another language (for some reason, it’s been my favourite thing to listen to lately, especially if it’s in French or Swedish). I think this means I’m destined to end up living in a cave outside some strange modern Gaul or Viking community. Eh, it could be worse, at least I’m not one of the six people crushed to death by a vending machine every year (that was my Snapple cap fact the other day).
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
I'm so tired, my mind is on the blink...
Well, it's a bit past 6 am here and I'm awake. "Good for you," one of you might be thinking right now, "getting up early to tackle the day!" Um, no. I just haven't slept all night. No need to worry though, I'm not so fraught with emotion that I can't partake in slumber or pulling a hectic all-nighter to write a paper my grade depends on. It's mostly due to the stupid ravens and kookaburras outside cackling all night keeping me awake. While home to some incredibly cute fuzzy mammals, creepy bugs, and poisonous things, Australia is also blessed with some of the most annoying birds in the world.
So what did I do to whittle away at these early morning hours? I wish I could say I enjoyed a cup of tea while reading a classic novel, but alas I did not. Unfortunately I haven't read a non-schoolwork related book in the entire time I've been here. It saddens me greatly. I have been pouring over every magazine and newspaper I can find though, so at least that's something. Their library here is in the mall, which I just can't get over. The MALL! That's like putting an Urban Outfitters in the middle of Home Depot. So I thought it over and using the wonders of Youtube, I've done the closest thing to curling up with traditional literature: Watched old episodes of 'Wishbone,' of course!
The sad thing is, I remember almost everything that happens within these episodes. A few seconds into 'Salty Dog,' (the Treasure Island episode, which weirdly enough, was written by now famous comedian/political commentator Mo Rocca) the main characters all bike ride up to an abandoned barn. Suddenly I think, "Wait a minute, there's a lucky horseshoe that Sam (the girl) wants and later they go in there, get stuck, and the barn is burning to the ground when she finds it!" That's precisely what happens and I haven't seen this show since it aired over twelve years ago. I have to wonder how much space in my brain is wasted just by storing early '90s TV show plots. So I decided to watch other shows I loved as a kid to see if I could recall them as well. Sure enough, I knew main turning points in episodes of 'Ghostwriter,' 'Blossom,' 'Family Matters,' 'Sabrina the Teenage Witch,' and 'Are You Afraid of the Dark?' from only a minute or so in. Hell, I even remembered a few direct quotes from an episode of 'Boy Meets World' I chose at random from the many seasons it ran. All that's been in my noggin for at least nine years and I never realized it until now. No wonder I can't recite my 7 and 12 times tables, they've been replaced with meaningless trivia!
Anyway, things are going great other than me discovering a lame excuse for a talent. I got an awesome new job at a cafe/restaurant and am pretty sure I also secured a (non-paying as usual but great opportunity) spot writing for a local music magazine! I was in such a good mood the other day that I went out and bought a ukulele. Yes, I impulse buy small stringed instruments, not clothes or chocolate like most females my age. It's the coolest instrument ever! I missed my guitar, which I was finally stating to get the hang of when I left, and decided it would be a good way to keep in practice. Plus it wasn't expensive at all and is much better suited for my tiny little hands. I've only had it for two days and I can play Frère Jacques already! Pretty soon I'll be a ukulele master and can do duets on a train with Patrick Wolf *sigh* I wish.
'Wishbone' and ukuleles... I realize how incredibly lame I am. I know I keep saying it, but I'll go somewhere interesting and take pictures soon. Once I have money from my job, I'll be able to travel more and who knows where the music writing could lead! This weekend, however, will be spent working said job and (finally) sleeping. Wooohooo.
So what did I do to whittle away at these early morning hours? I wish I could say I enjoyed a cup of tea while reading a classic novel, but alas I did not. Unfortunately I haven't read a non-schoolwork related book in the entire time I've been here. It saddens me greatly. I have been pouring over every magazine and newspaper I can find though, so at least that's something. Their library here is in the mall, which I just can't get over. The MALL! That's like putting an Urban Outfitters in the middle of Home Depot. So I thought it over and using the wonders of Youtube, I've done the closest thing to curling up with traditional literature: Watched old episodes of 'Wishbone,' of course!
The sad thing is, I remember almost everything that happens within these episodes. A few seconds into 'Salty Dog,' (the Treasure Island episode, which weirdly enough, was written by now famous comedian/political commentator Mo Rocca) the main characters all bike ride up to an abandoned barn. Suddenly I think, "Wait a minute, there's a lucky horseshoe that Sam (the girl) wants and later they go in there, get stuck, and the barn is burning to the ground when she finds it!" That's precisely what happens and I haven't seen this show since it aired over twelve years ago. I have to wonder how much space in my brain is wasted just by storing early '90s TV show plots. So I decided to watch other shows I loved as a kid to see if I could recall them as well. Sure enough, I knew main turning points in episodes of 'Ghostwriter,' 'Blossom,' 'Family Matters,' 'Sabrina the Teenage Witch,' and 'Are You Afraid of the Dark?' from only a minute or so in. Hell, I even remembered a few direct quotes from an episode of 'Boy Meets World' I chose at random from the many seasons it ran. All that's been in my noggin for at least nine years and I never realized it until now. No wonder I can't recite my 7 and 12 times tables, they've been replaced with meaningless trivia!
Anyway, things are going great other than me discovering a lame excuse for a talent. I got an awesome new job at a cafe/restaurant and am pretty sure I also secured a (non-paying as usual but great opportunity) spot writing for a local music magazine! I was in such a good mood the other day that I went out and bought a ukulele. Yes, I impulse buy small stringed instruments, not clothes or chocolate like most females my age. It's the coolest instrument ever! I missed my guitar, which I was finally stating to get the hang of when I left, and decided it would be a good way to keep in practice. Plus it wasn't expensive at all and is much better suited for my tiny little hands. I've only had it for two days and I can play Frère Jacques already! Pretty soon I'll be a ukulele master and can do duets on a train with Patrick Wolf *sigh* I wish.
'Wishbone' and ukuleles... I realize how incredibly lame I am. I know I keep saying it, but I'll go somewhere interesting and take pictures soon. Once I have money from my job, I'll be able to travel more and who knows where the music writing could lead! This weekend, however, will be spent working said job and (finally) sleeping. Wooohooo.
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